Enlightenment is not a solo job!

meditation mountainMany years ago I used to think that the journey of waking up was a solo job. That “I” had to become enlightened, and not only that but to be more enlightened than most other people.

But once you start to look Truth in the eyes, it becomes clear that such an idea is a contradiction within itself. For waking up is the dissolving of the “I’ into the One, and so the “I am more enlightened than you” concept is simply yet another form of separation, albeit a well-disguised one!

Waking up is something we do together. The truth of our togetherness overcoming the illusion of our apparent separation IS the wake up!

“Either we are all in God, or none of us is.”*

So therefore it is pointless to dismiss our brothers and sisters with judgments of how unenlightened they are, or how messed up they are. It would be more fruitful to ask instead “How can I support them right now?” or “How can I love them?”. ..basically, what does this person need in order to return to their true nature?

light in othersWhen I find my mind is going into judgment about someone, I offer the judgments up to the Highest Consciousness and pray that they be replaced by compassion. And that switch in perception from judgment to compassion IS the healing. It is the greatest healing, and it brings my freedom as well as theirs.

“When I am healed, I am not healed alone.”*

Tantra keeps showing me that so much of the human experience is about relating. Not only the sexual relationships, but ALL relationships are a pathway of awakening, if we choose that purpose for them. Actually, relationships are our teacher whether we choose it or not!

I often look around at the world of Tantra and I think “wow, we are all here to wake each other up”. We are in a world of mirrors and reflections, and we are here learning how to love one another. Together we are discovering the places where we are holding back our love, or blocking the love that is being offered to us. Could there anything more important to learn than this?!

And what I am seeing is a miracle. Truly we are waking up together! We are giving each other the permission to be our true selves. Even Facebook is reflecting the rising in consciousness…today I see less and less posts of “what I had for breakfast” and more and more reflections, insights and inspirations.

How we handle intimate relationships is a super measuring-stick to test out how our evolution is going. Awakening is not about using the most enlightened language, but living the most enlightened life. Can we see the divine in every other human being? Can we see their true nature, even in the moments that the other person is not acting it? How far have we overcome judgments and separation?

This past year I have a deeper than ever sense of gratitude for those who have supported me through my life challenges. In one incident, a woman I had never met before reached out to me and held me in my tears during a challenging moment. Her name meant “angel” in Estonian. At that moment, my heart swelling with gratitude, I made a deep intention never to miss an opportunity to be an angel for someone in my presence who might need support.

hands of lightAnd so here we are, taking each other’s hands as we all walk the path back home. Trading judgments for compassion. Choosing love over separation. Looking in the eyes and seeing ourself there, our true self. Truly this is a path of love.

Finally, a song that I sang with friends in a cuddle-puddle we found ourselves in as we began the first day of 2015…the lyrics seem to capture that meeting of awakening and compassion:

“Let your light shine, shine, shine; there may be someone down in the valley trying to get home.”


* Quotes from A Course in Miracles

Comments 9

  1. Melody Rowe Daugherty

    Good Morning,
    Thank you for this deep conversation about how to become the light for others.

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  2. Katja

    Yes, yes, yes!! Beautifully said! Just found your blog and really enjoy reading your posts.
    It’s so good to see that more and more people are awakening to that realisation that we truly are One – and what it means in practical terms. Of course it may mean so many different things to different people, but I have found that for myself what you’re saying about seeing the teacher in everyone we meet was a big game changer a few years ago. Not easy, no, but soooo rewarding 🙂
    Keep up the good work 🙂
    love & light,

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  3. Dimitri Montfoort

    Thank you for this view. We are in this together. This helps dissolving the separation in me.

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